Strained relationship; bring it back to normal.
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I have personally realised the attraction and distraction of people around me when we recall days decades ago and now in the present moments. There is rare stability and fluency in relationships for long durations.
In relationships, there are new entrants, and likewise, there are outgoings. The process continues in all cultures and in coordination. In the majority of cases, there is a relationship because of pedigree, workplace, beliefs, occupation, or something else binding people together. But the equation of relationships varies from good to bad, or vice versa, depending on one’s own understanding and relevant changes.
Relationship matters. Humans have learned to live in groups. Isolation amounts to punishment, barring exceptional situations.
Normal decline in relationships is not the focus of this article, but strained relationships are. For me, half of the downfall in a relationship is normal, like the relationships at the time with parents or grandparents, and half is circumstantial, which covers present relationships. When I count myself vis-à-vis my relationships connected to my family, professional connections, and living in changed surroundings, I have examined reasons for decline and measures to bring them back to normal, as said below:
Expectations
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It is a major factor in bitter relationships. It may happen at any level—living together, working together, partners, stakeholders, business, or other joint actions. High expectations are in themselves the wrong frame of mind, and the cure is to keep the expectations below the current trend, at least in mind.
Conceptions
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People are generally commenting that you have changed. There is nothing wrong with it. It is normal. Multi-directional changes happen. If somebody has no regard for you, it is a slide. By keeping ethical values intact, other aspects lose their glitter as time moves, and both sides must be ready to accept it.
Awareness
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A change in the measured relationship is possible when awareness levels go up. Awareness makes it imperative to modify how we deal with situations, socially, financially, professionally, and emotionally.
Assumptions
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Negative assumptions do more harm than open conflicts. There is a flow of information among people of any cadre, and misinformation is also injected in this process. Verification or cross-checking of news or views are normally not common practices. This deficiency leads to baseless assumptions and the propagation of negativity. Remedy lies in going to the roots of the issues under bitterness.
Personal values
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As I dislike showing off, I find it burdensome to reconcile with any close group, practicing a show of wealth, power, and upper hand in any gatherings or events. Here, differences are most likely to persist until erring groups or individuals make amendments in their behaviour. A value-based difference lasts a long time, even at the cost of being harsh on either side.
Let it go.
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People like to stay in strained relationships, just for revenge or wishing to fall for the other side in a situation or position. These attitudes need correction. There is no gain in being revengeful. The best course of action is to forget the issue. It is hard to choose, but it works as a panacea for all our meaningless mental pressure.
Emotions
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Negative emotions are the makers and sustainers of bad relationships. Mindful talk, proper listening, ethical norms, and keeping our egos under check are likely to save us from deteriorating togetherness.
Proving innocency
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It is very difficult to accept our own faults. When I realised that immediate reactions were the reasons for bad turns of events, it came to my mind that being silent at those moments was the best remedy. But I erred. This opened the path to reopening relationships on better footing without much loss of time.
Final words
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Better relations pay off in all circumstances. Learn to accept people for who they are. Look inward and make corrections to face what comes our way.
